This month, we connected with Cait to discuss her highly empathetic and psychological approach to solving financial problems, particularly as they relate to relationships.

## Cait, tell us a little about yourself and your professional background. I am a Financial Coach, Accredited Financial Counselor, Relationships & Money Specialist and candidate for the CFP® Certification. After receiving my MBA in 2014, I found my way into the Financial Coaching and Planning field where I am passionate about helping people uncover their ideal life goals, navigate their values and money beliefs and helping them shift behavior to achieve their dreams. I tend to resonate especially well with couples, the XY Generations, LGBTQ+ individuals and progressive, unconventional professionals. My broader interests also include Trauma-Informed Financial Practices, Emotionally Focused Therapy and financial advocacy work for the LGBTQ+ community. In my downtime, I enjoy hiking, traveling (especially to New Orleans), spending time with my nephews and playing with my beautiful Golden Retriever “dog-ger.”
## What life experiences attracted you to financial coaching and planning? I grew up in Central Arkansas on about a hundred acres of land that was passed down from my grandparents to my father and his siblings. My Omi (grandmother) immigrated from Germany to Arkansas when she was in her late 20s. She and my grandfather diligently worked to cover the costs of the land, property taxes, and its maintenance; these expenses often resulted in arduous financial sacrifice. My grandfather worked incredibly hard, but he did not have a penchant for frugal money management. My grandparents could make ends meet, but they could never quite get ahead. My father wanted do things a bit differently. My Dad recognized that in order to have a little more security and to have a little more fun in life - he needed to live today while planning for tomorrow. He recognized the importance of saving for retirement, learning to invest, socking away for Christmas and planning for vacations. I watched my parents struggle to figure out how to make money work for them. They both were overcoming impeding money scripts that each had learned amidst their development while learning healthier financial strategies as a couple. With loving intention and some very heated conversations, they made it to the other side. My parents taught my brother and I to work hard and to get good grades. ::smirks:: Truthfully, at the time, I thought they were just being strict about bringing home all As on our report cards. I hustled to receive a fully-funded scholarship and became a first generation college student. I took away several money lessons from my childhood that laid the bedrock to me pursuing a career in personal finance. 1. Debt can help you accomplish your financial goals, but it must be used responsibly. 2. Your education and occupation can make or break your bank account and happiness. 3. Financial discussions and decision making as a couple requires in-depth self-awareness, understanding of one’s partner, and collaboration amidst crucial conversations. 4. Per my father, if “my mother spent as much time reading investment books as she spent reading romance novels- my parents would already be retired.” My parents started their marriage with very little financial education and guidance beneath them. Most of what they know was learned through personal inquiry or conversations with colleagues and friends. They have created an incredible life, but it makes me wonder where my parents would be had they learned these financial lessons earlier in their lives. Bringing my story full circle, I strive to help make a difference in the financial trajectory of those whose stories echo my own. I want all individuals to be afforded equal access to Financial Coaching and Financial Planning. I am diligently working to help create a future where individuals are not denied financial education and wealth management on the basis of asset levels, location, race, color, religion, creed, sex, sexual orientation, pregnancy and pregnancy-related conditions, gender identity, national origin, ancestry, age, veteran status, disability, genetic information, military service or any other other protected status.
## What is your favorite thing about working at SmartPath? Whew! I have many favorite things, but I’ll narrow it down to three. There are people who say that they really love their jobs, but we typically don’t believe them. However, I REALLY love my job. 1. My role allows me to work with everyday Americans to solve their financial problems with personalized, unbiased dialogue and strategies. 2. I love our commitment to diversity as an organization. Women compose approximately 51% of the U.S. population, and not only outnumber men in graduating from college, but also represent the majority of the workforce. However, women are the minority within the financial services industry, specifically, the financial planning profession. Many firms are less likely to hire and support women which therein leads to a lack of visible female role models for women who could consider the occupation. SmartPath champions inclusive hiring practices to employ a staff of professionals that closely reflects the demographics of the public we serve. 3. Lastly, I would have to say one of favorite things about working at SmartPath is the free coffee and snacks. :)
## I believe one of your core areas of focus is how financial disagreements strain relationships. Will you share your financial and psychological advice on how to bridge the gap with your partner when it comes to love and money? Some of the most impactful Financial Coaching sessions are spent guiding individuals and couples through the process of revisiting money experiences, uncovering limiting beliefs and cultivating new ways of emotion, cognition and behavior to achieve their financial goals. When it comes to money - we often feel like we should be able to figure out how to save a little, spend a little and call it a day. If only it were that easy! We each have experiences that have positively and negatively shaped how we feel about money (and about relationships). It’s these personal meanings that guide how we deal with money and conflict within our partnerships. Arguments about money rarely have to do with where or how the actual money was spent. The origins of these disputes are usually based in one or both partners not feeling connected, trusting, understood, or safe and secure. Why is that? Money is a symbol that can represent our hopes, our dreams, our fears and our insecurities. So, what to do? __1. Strive to understand your partner__. We all need someone to really see us, to hear us, and to be there for us when it really matters. In order to have a conversation about money with your partner, you both will need to feel safe to discuss vulnerabilities with one another. Set up a comfortable time and place to have a money conversation. Without judgment - ask questions to discuss who your partner is, what finances were like growing up, what dreams and fears are attached to their money, and why they came to be who they are now. The goal here is to actively listen to your partner express their needs and wishes, hear your partner’s emotion, and to understand and validate their expressed experience. It is to not change their mind. Keep in mind - no matter how bizarre a person's behavior, it'll seem perfectly reasonable once you understand his or her story. __2. Collaborate on collective goals__. People often perceive their partner as dissimilar to them. When you create a space to safely share your dreams with your partner, you give your relationship the opportunity to have a sense of shared meaning. You can use this shared meaning to discuss goals for the future and a plan to achieve them. __3. Leave room for individuality.__ Relationships can survive partners being very different. Money differences within a partnership only have as much meaning as we personally assign these misalignments. We come into our relationship as an individual. We each have personal desires on how to spend our money. I recommend having a “yours”, “mine”, and “ours” account. Figure out how much money it will take monthly to cover the household bills, how much to dedicate to savings, and how much you want to put towards your current financial goal (emergency savings, debt pay-off, travel, education planning, etc.). After these expenses are covered, take any excess between the two of you and divy up this money into your individual accounts. Spend this money as you’d like. One of you may want a daily latte, while the other wants to squirrel this money away for a boy’s/girl’s trip in the fall - make decisions together on the household account and spend your personal money as you’d like. __4. Shared control.__ Two heads are better than one. When it comes to managing money as a couple, both individuals need to be a part of this management. One partner may have an affinity for paying bills, whereas one person is a wonderful strategist for laying out your 5 year financial plan. Use these strengths to help navigate your financial life together. Discuss how often you’d like to sit down to discuss the financial “state of the union,” decide on roles and responsibilities, lay out goals, update your progress and celebrate even the smallest of financial wins. I recommend that my clients collaborate at least once (if not twice a month in the beginning) over their finances. Additionally, within the first two years - take turns on financial job duties every three to six months so that each partner has exposure to different facets of their financial life. It’s important to know how to manage your money as an individual and together.
## If you could narrow it down, what is your biggest hope for clients you partner with? Money is really stinking hard. It is incredibly important for my clients to know that there is nothing “wrong with them” if they do not have experience managing money or if they simply are not great at the process. People are whole and the “experts” on themselves. I am here to be a guide to help others understand their emotions surrounding money, to provide financial education, to brainstorm mutually decided upon next steps and to provide a container of safe accountability amidst the Financial Coaching and Planning process.

Interview with SmartPath Love & Money expert, Cait Howerton

About Us

Learn

Useful Links

Reach Us @